Additional Pro-Tips for a Thursday Afternoon

If you’re a new scientist writing a career grant and you write that you are going to learn a technique by coming and studying in my laboratory…

..you should probably tell me that first. Because, when the reviewer (who is my good friend) calls me and asks if this is true and it is the first I have heard of it, the fact that I have the following reaction…

britta-surprised

…is not going to help your grant.

The shitty part is that, if this person had called me and said to me specifically “I want to list you in my grant,” I probably would have said “yes.” Even if I have said in the past, “Let me know what I can do to help,” you still *let me know*.

2pm Sleepies and Nice, New Offices…

This is a post about absolutely nothing of value. There is no insight to be found in the text below..

This is about the time of the day where I start to get sleepy and tired and non-productive. I don’t know what it is about 2pm, but my eyes start getting heavy and  I have decided that I am going to start hitting the gym when my eyes get heavy…if I can make my sleepy self get out of my extremely comfortable office chair.

I think that I like my new office. I’ve got a big window that looks out over campus and I can see people scurrying to and fro, but I also miss having my office/cave attached to the lab. People would come in and ask me questions throughout the day and it was easy to see what people were working on.  But, being slightly removed and isolated means that it is quiet and I am generally undisturbed. With all that quiet time, I’ve been a very productive writer in this space. I’ve been efficient at outlining my grants and some papers I have left to write and I have had the time and peace to strategize my plan of attack.

I’m glad to see my plans for world domination coming together, but I’m also looking forward to being distracted by busy lab of ratchet science again..

Blessings and Challenges…

I’ve been at my new MRU for about three weeks and it has been generally amazing. I am loving my new department so far. Everyone is friendly and supportive so far and I think things are moving forward well. One of the things that I am both blessed by and conflicted about is how much Little Isis has stepped up to the plate since we’ve been living the single parent lifestyle during the week. Getting himself ready in the morning. Doing the dishes. This morning he made his own breakfast. He’s also hugged me when I’ve felt overwhelmed and cried. I feel conflicted about that. Children shouldn’t have to care for their parents, but he’s taken some sort of ownership for the functioning of our life and I am grateful. He’s still seven, and is occasionally a wild and crazy guy, but he’s matured exponentially in the last few weeks…

My schedule over the last two days has also challenged my single mom lifestyle. Yesterday I had to teach until 6pm. I warned my chair that this would mean that I would have to get them from daycare and bring them with me to teach. I set Little Isis up with the iPad and Tiny Diva got some episodes of her beloved Dora the Explorer. I was generally confident that they would be good, but nervous that it could go very, very poorly. I feel fortunate that they were so well behaved, but by the time we got home they were exhausted. We had a quick dinner and snuggled and settled back into our routine.

This morning i had a required orientation that was supposed to start at 7:45. That’s just bananas and I figured I would get there when I could. More than even I am thinking that scheduling anything “required” before 9am or after 4pm is just a dick move. There’s just no need for it. But the irony is that this meeting, that began before 8am, begins with a discussion of how much my new employer values “work-life balance.” I feel you, but…

mariahc

I also am realizing that I may be a bit of an over-sharer. I know that will not be a surprise to any of you. This morning my new department mate turned to me and said “Everytime I notice my thighs rubbing, I think of you.”

Huh.

Additional Thoughts on Moving to a New Place – Part 52 in the Series

There were a lot of things I was prepared for in moving MRUs – having to rebuild my lab and figure out the bureaucracy.  I was prepared for having the learn the general logistical bullshittery of a whole new place.

 

I was not prepared for the fact that every piece of software I use has a new version since the ones I purchased at old MRU and now I know how to use none of them. Even Word is slathering me with fuckery today. Where’s my damned Cite While You Write, bitches???

 

Damn it.

If We Acted Like Our Children and All the Crazy the World Has to Give…

I have so many random things to tell you all. First, I realize that I teased you all with a post about cooking on Sunday and then failed to follow-up with the finale pictures. I won’t like to you. I started with a glass of wine while I was cooking and then got distracted. It happens to the best of us…

Adore Delano is my life right now. I frequently find myself wondering if I am having an Adore moment. I appreciate this kind of crazy.

I don’t understand all the “Real ‘muricans” contacting me to tell me that I should change my name because some crazy ass people in another part of the world are doing some abhorrent shit. Some, I suspect, are tongue in cheek. Many, I think, are not and it makes me afraid for humanity and they remind me of that  crazy Mabus guy who used to stalk PZ Myers. I do not appreciate this kind of crazy.

Lastly, I was reminded this morning about something I once heard Aunt Isis say. Aunt Isis is my mother’s youngest sister and because we are close in age, we have been very close and have spent a lot of time together. I remember Aunt Isis once scolding her children for some fuckery they were involved in and telling them, “You’re lucky you’re my children, If anyone else treated me like you do, I would lay them out.” I remember thinking, “Whoa!!!”

whoaThen this morning I was getting ready for work and decided to let Tiny Diva sleep in because the Isis children were exhausted last night. Tiny Diva is a deceptive little person. She is adorable, with blonde pigtails and the sweetest little smile, but underneath the facade can be salty and ratchet as fuck. If Little Isis is the cool and calm way I envision myself, Tiny Diva is my id. When I finally woke her up, she emerged from her crib saltier than normal and stomped around the house slamming every door and proclaiming “The morning is so rude to me! I hate everything!!”

I thought to myself, “If you were anyone else, little ratchet child,, I would lay you out. Only my maternal love for you is saving you.” But, I also found myself thinking how funny it would be if the tables were turned and I woke up like Tiny Diva, just stomping around and being generally destructive. What would she even do with her little self if her mother lost her mind similarly, flipping tables and dropping mics everywhere…

mic dropThe morning is rude to me too, Tiny Diva. The morning is rude to me too.