Earlier today I posted on this blog, intending to poke a little at ole Prof-Like Substance. PLS has recently taken up running and, if you follow on Twitter, you might have noticed that I have been teasing him about needing running tights.
Having grown up in a warm weather place, I hate to be cold. So, running tights are essential for me, but I don’t like to wear anything else if I’m wearing tights. Life just gets too sweaty. Well, today my tights got the best of me. On Saturday I went to the local running pro shop for a new pair and the nice fella sold me a pair of New Balance tights. I’ve never had New Balance tights, but he seemed to like them. He said to me the word’s I’ll never forget:
You’re going to love these tights. They’ve got the wind blocker in the front, but they’re still breathable in the back.
I tried them on, liked the freedom of movement around the knees, and went with them. I raced in them yesterday without a problem. Today, however, was a windier day and I realized the limitation of my tights’ technology. If its windy, and your runs tend to take you in loops, you end up with the wind at your back where your tights are not wind proof.
If, like occurred today, the wind at your back occurs at the end of your run, then you’ve got below freezing winds beating up against a sweaty ass crack.
Then, and I’ll need to ask you to trust me on this one, you end up with a wind burnt and frost bitten ass crack. This situation is not cute.
I’m now having to tend carefully to my poor, chafed self. Not since college has my poor backside been covered in so much Vaseline. Next time the running shop guy tries to talk me into a new type of tight, I’m going to make sure the wind proofing goes all the way around….