If you search around the interwebz, there are lots of women giving lots of advice to pregnant women about how to get a baby out. Bumpy car rides, sex, castor oil, nipple stimulation, assorted weird herbal teas. All supposedly cause labor induction.
Certainly, it’s all unsubstantiated bullshit. But beyond that, I say just wait until that baby comes out on its own and try to rest in the mean time. Once it’s out you can’t put it back in and, trust me, some days you’re going to wish you could put the little fucker back in.
Figure 1: If they weren’t so damned cute, we’d probably make like hamsters and eat our young.
As a childless man, I think it’s important I immediately jump in with everything I know on the subject:
“My sisters probably have something to say about this.”
There. That is all.
No shit. I tried it all and she still didn’t come out. Ended up with an induction….and now I wonder why I had another
hindsight is 20/20, i’m sure. for now it’s hard to see past the grating joint problem and absence of a single moment of comfort or rest. just sayin…
Isis, I agree.
b.t.w. how is Tiny Diva’s cough? Did you work out a cause – and more importantly – a cure????
d.
AAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!
Need a tag: #NosyPeopleSplainThingsToMe. It doesn’t seem to matter what your problem might be, someone will suggest the latest bit of woo. It doesn’t matter if it’s getting babies, pushing babies out or what vehicle one uses to push babies around. And! FSM forbid you are in public, fighting an obvious illness say ‘bald from chemo’. After I explained (years ago) to a beggar that I wouldn’t be making a contribution and that perhaps shaking down cancer patients was not the most effective way of raising funds, he thought for a moment and said ‘Green Algae’. Seriously?
I’ve learned to say ‘Isn’t it great that we live in a world with so many options?’ and back away from the crazy people. This handy phrase seems to work, whether one is fighting a cold or dithering over dessert. (Really, I don’t need to hear from other people about the virtue of vanilla when I’m dithering over chocolate cake or chocolate pudding. The nerve.)
errr we were told to “walk around the block a few times” instead of being admitted (cause not enough dilation).. after we did that and came back, to be told the same thing.. the wife threaten to call up GOD and have them DESTROYED!!! i.e. she called the doctor and was admitted..
and she never did dilate or push hard enough and my son was born by C-section..
Tiny Diva is on the mend. We are suspecting that she had some allergies, but we have the cough under control and are finally getting some damned sleep. Sleep is like that old 80 track – you don’t know what you got ’til it’s gone.
I believe Joni sang Big Yellow Taxi in the 60′s.
Yes, there were more than a score of times in the first year I wanted to miniaturize the buglet and make him stay inside until I could handle the increased lack of sleep (insomniac here) and take an early childhood parenting class.
Denise, you are so wise in coming up with that better-than-”thank you . Go away now”! However, good chocolate concoctions have vanilla in them–those two go so well together, enhancing the other. Both beans, but cacao pods look really weird on the tree.
I, too, will pass on the green algae for fighting most serious ailments.
Butterfly milk on the eyelids
Ah, that prime ointment!
I could happily murder people who tell you to “walk and the baby will come out.” I walked for several hours a day until I was two weeks overdue and had pre-eclampsia. Then I had an emergency hospital admission and pitocin, which made the baby come out. (I think I drank some useless herbal bullshit along the way, too.)